Breakups can be daunting especially when the relationship in question was an emotionally draining one. One in which you may have invested your time, energy, resources hoping for the best and then everything crumbles in your face.
Experts say men find it more difficult to cope with a breakup than women. “Could this be true or do we think otherwise?”
Edosa had a pretty good relationship with her boo up until she found out Ik had done the unimaginable and guess what! He ran off with another. Read her story below
Everyone thought he had cast a spell on me but I didnt mind because as far as I was concerned, I had met the one and they were simply jealous or too clueless to notice.
IK was a guy for the girls; tall, dark, handsome, great kisser just name it. This was why ending the relationship with him often felt like a herculean task even when i caught him making out with several girls at his place at different times.
I made up my mind to stay with him for as long as it takes up until this very good day. It was a very lazy saturday morning as I had gone clubbing with my friends the previous night. We had just finished our exams the week before. It was really stressful and demanding. It was my final year and i couldn’t afford a single carry over. I was going to graduate that year and not even the devil could stop me.
While I was in dreamland enjoying my sleep to the fullest, I was woken up with a very hot slap on my thighs. I jumped up immediately with the same speed as that of light. It was my new boyfriend Emeka. What is all these he screamed. What is what? I replied angrily. All this around your genital areas. Around where? Look at it he said.
What are all these I shouted. It must have been there for a while. You cant tell me you haven’t noticed all these Edosa. I haven’t I swear I replied as I burst into tears.
You swear… Really? You just a bloody liar. You made me wait this long to have sex with you knowing fully well you have an infection. Mehnn I can believe this he shouted at the top of his voice as he threw the table in front of us away.
Ok you know what! Just get the hell out of my house this minute. Emeka please I can explain I said crying.
Explain what? Haaaa Lagos girls. You are all the same. Gettout now
I ran towards the wardrobe, grabbed my cloth and was heading to the bathroom when he stopped me. What do you think you are doing? I want to quickly have my bath I said crying. Not in this house he replied angrily as he pushed me out.
I came out of the house crying bitterly. This has to be the most embarassing day of my life. How on earth did this happen? Where did this come from?
It took me about 6 months to get an appointment at the clinic. I was too scared and embarassed. When I finally got to the clinic, the doctor examined me and afterwards he asked me to have a seat. He said to me; from my examination, you have genital warts.
I looked at him still confused. He got it and went further to explain. Genital warts is caused by HPV (Human Papilloma Virus), a different strain of the virus responsible for cervical cancer.
Cervical cancer I screamed as I repeated after him. I was so scared. How would this have happened I thought to myself. So how does one get infected with this virus and how does it go on to cause genital warts I asked.
The virus is sexually transmitted he replied.
Ok I said as I paused for a minute to have a quick reflection of how this may have happened. At this point, I was no longer shy, I knew I had to open up completely. After all I dint expect him to think I was a virgin not after my diagnosis.
Doctor I have never had unprotected sex. I always use a condom. He looked at me, smiled and replied; My dear, Condoms do not prevent the transmission of HPV.
Oops..I had no Idea. I was beginning to get scared and he could see it on my face. IK had put me in serious trouble and to crown it all he was nowhere to be found. If only I had listened to my friends who adviced me against dating him. So what do I do now Dr?
You need to get treated he said. Oh I can get treated. Really? I said with a sigh of relief. Before then I had thought getting into a new relationship was never going to happen as the sight of my genital area was just too embarassing.
Yes you can he replied. You can go and come back whenever you are ready. Did he just say go and come back? Go where….That was never going to happen.
Can I have the treatment now? Of course you can he smiled at me and went ahead to get set for the procedure.
While I was having the procedure, I could hear my phone beep all through. As soon as I got down the examination table, I reached for my phone and what did I see? A series of messages from Emeka apologising for what he did and asking for us to see to talk things over.
Going back to Emeka would be jumping fro fry-pan to fire. The last thing i need now is a man who has no respect whatsoever for women. I rather just be alone for now and wait until the right person comes.
I had a few more appointments and in due time the warts went away.
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